A Modern-Form Poems:
Poetry Conversation With A Drug Addict
When human beings,
in every culture,
seeks to understand
'Why did she do it?'
the answer is not a mathematical formula
but a story:
'First, this happened,
Then that happened,
And then she decided to do drugs.'
THIS POETRY BOOK CONTAINS 12 POEMS.
IT'S A RENDITION GIVEN BY A PERSON DIAGNOSED WITH AN OCD.
THE FIRST POEM GOES LIKE THIS,
1 January 2020
First let me wake
I think I woke on the wrong side
My body has been cramped into a position
The sky’s bright
The opposite of what I’m feeling
But I was sure I felt good yesterday
Only today I’m not feeling good No this cannot be happening I just woke
Second I shouldn’t have drank
It made me depressed every time the next morning
I should quit for my mental health
I should quit my boyfriend too
There’s nothing I want to write in this fifth and six line here
But I got to So it’d be symmetrical with the above Only then I’ll relax and feel complete
But oh well
POEM 1: DEPRESSION AND STRESS
Another day of being in the darkest hole
on earth while standing at the top of the
mountain for all to see I call it brown and blue
It feels like my heart is breaking
ever since I was little, I was sad
ever since I was a child,
I didn't know the bright colours of life I
just kept guessing on how I should act
Another day of ‘I just want to be happy’
But why is it so hard that these emotions
blindness are draining me up I
bite the chill every time they arise And
I freeze over in coldness
Is there nobody to save me?
Today, I try again
to search for something
to make me feel it
I go out and walk to a park
I thought everything will change
But, once again, I am let down
It’s like a knife cutting through my tiny
sliver of hope
What else do I have to do?
This ground is getting heavier
I just want to die because of this bleakness
Just tell me honestly if there is a way out?
I want to know a better life
without depression and stress
numbing and vacuuming all my feelings away
So I go to sleep hoping for a better day, again
I cannot miss what I never felt; happiness
But will it come to my address on Christmas…?
Written Book in the Perspective of a Father of a Character 24 Years Old Son, Gone.
HIS LIFE
24 years a life well lived
24 years a life well loved
I have you in my heart
I thought that I had gotten used to it, after time passed
But it’s always hard and not easy
It’s always something new and not same
I thought I had gotten a lot more comfortable
But there’s always something I feel uncomfortable about
It’s difficult the more I learn about it
It’s the same as life
HIS FEAR (LAST MOMENTS)
I fear nobody will be able to save me this time
In this situation all or no, my mind got lost in the woods,
What I need is somebody who heals
Somebody who knows
Somebody who will come close to me
Somebody who holds me
It’s easy to spill with the mouth
But nobody can replace you
Maybe, ah, it’s surprising that you can turn all the pain away
Therefore, even though the night came in day that hurts, that bleeds now
You’re not here to help me to solve it all
I lost my pride and suddenly lost my heart
I’m already used to being someone who you loved
I’m worried nobody can depend on me this time
My heart will break
This love, all or no enemy, and
One night sleep where you lose you
What I need now is somebody who knows
Somebody who heals
Somebody who will approach me
I just want you to know how I feel
It’s easy to speak with the mouth
But nobody can replace you
Maybe it’s surprising to come up out of you
Thanks to you
Therefore, even though the night comes in day that hurts that bleeds now
You’re not gonna be here to help me solve it all
POEM 1: DEPRESSION AND STRESS
Another day of being in the darkest hole
on earth while standing at the top of the
mountain for all to see I call it brown and blue
It feels like my heart is breaking
ever since I was little, I was sad
ever since I was a child,
I didn't know the bright colours of life I
just kept guessing on how I should act
Another day of ‘I just want to be happy’
But why is it so hard that these emotions
blindness are draining me up I
bite the chill every time they arise And
I freeze over in coldness
Is there nobody to save me?
Today, I try again
to search for something
to make me feel it
I go out and walk to a park
I thought everything will change
But, once again, I am let down
It’s like a knife cutting through my tiny
sliver of hope
What else do I have to do?
This ground is getting heavier
I just want to die because of this bleakness
Just tell me honestly if there is a way out?
I want to know a better life
without depression and stress
numbing and vacuuming all my feelings away
So I go to sleep hoping for a better day, again
I cannot miss what I never felt; happiness
But will it come to my address on Christmas…?
